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South Dakota, 2004
- In Memory of Grandma (Rosemary) Jones -
My dad got a call last Friday that his mom (my grandma) was
in the hospital for heart failure, and the situation didn't look good. She
has had heart trouble in the past, and this summer things have been especially
bad. But this time it was so serious that the whole family was called to Sioux
Falls, South Dakota to be together in case she didn't make it.
We took a red-eye flight on Satuday morning. When we got there, my Grandpa
Jones and my brother were waiting for us at the airport to take us to the
Sioux Valley Hospital.
We went in to the room where my Grandma was - she was on the
hospital bed with a cloth on her forehead, hooked up to all sorts of machines.
She had slipped into a coma, so she couldn't talk to us, but we stayed in
there for a while talking to her anyway. There were a few other family members
at the hospital when we got there, and by the afternoon, pretty much everybody
was in the waiting room, as the doctors told the adults what the situation
was.
My uncle John is a doctor as well, so when he had spoken with the doctors,
he explained it to the rest of us. He told us that Grandma probably wouldn't
make it, and that she probably only had a few hours to a few days left. He
didn't seem to confident in the treatment the other doctors were giving, and
he recommended adding some sort of blood line that would give them more accurate
readings so that they'd be sure that they were giving her the right dosage
of medicines.
They did add the line, but it took a little while to get the results. In the
meantime, the newest member of the family, Anna, tried to cheer up the rest
of us.
Unfortunately, the new readings were the same as the old readings, and so
they said there was no chance that she would recover. They also said that
the best thing to do was to disconnect her from all the machines, because
that way she could be comfortable for her last few hours. They disconnected
the machines, and my Grandpa and the direct family went in for a while, and
then they called in the Grandkids, and a priest came in and gave the last
rights. Everyone was crying and hugging, and not too long after that my grandma
passed away, with her whole family there with her.
Later on, everybody went back to Grandpa's condo. The adults stayed in one
area figuring out all the funeral arrangements and things, while we kids entertained
ourselves playing 'Risk.'
Most of the kids hadn't brought appropriate funeral clothes, so the next day
everyone went to the Empire Mall to get some clothes.
At the mall they had some interesting things: The Dakota Zone (which turned
out to be a kind of South Dakota gift shop for tourist things), an automatic
trash can (what's automatic about it? rather than pushing the door open with
your tray, a sensor opens it for you.)
They also had a nice swimsuit on sale for $5.99 (75% off!)
that I considered getting, but then I realized I have one just like it already:
Then we went back to the condo again, where there was a huge rainstorm. Once
it stopped raining, the kids went out and played in the parking lot, riding
skateboards through the puddles and such.
Afterwards, all the family went to the hotel where most people were staying
to go swimming. There were some nice clouds on the drive there:
The kids played in the pool for a few hours, while the adults watched from
the side. The main pool activity of the night was when everyone in the pool
(our family started it, but we got the rest of the people there to join in
as well) to go as fast as they could around the edge of the pool in a circle
until we got a strong current going, and then everyone would turn around at
the same time and try to swim against the current. I know I've tried this
with different groups before, but this is the first time in my memory that
it actually worked.
When I got to the hotel I was staying at with my brother (different than the
hotel with the pool), I noticed a sign on the door of a ballroom:
The door was locked then, but in the morning it was open - the Jerry Lewis
MDA Telethon. Jerry Lewis wasn't there because it was just the Sioux Falls
piece of the nation-wide event, but it was still interesting to look at.
The next day at the condo, the kids had to entertain themselves again, so
we played Risk again for many hours, and in between games we put together
a 'Lord of the Rings' puzzle one of the cousins had brought.
We also had fun looking at old pictures my Grandpa had - one from when he
was in the House of Representatives in the late 50s (his picture is the one
that I made lighter than the rest), and one of my Grandma and Grandpa kissing
back when they were young'ns.
By that night the kids had started to get rowdy, so we were sent out to the
balcony, where we played more Risk and the cousins called strangers on each
others cell phones.
On the drive back to the hotel that night, I was testing different settings
on my camera to see if I could make one of those pictures where all the lights
stretch out in long lines, but the car was to bumpy for the lines to stay
straight. I thought the effect looked cool anyway.
The next morning was the funeral mass at the Catholic church my grandparents
went to in Sioux Falls. It was a very nice service. My dad gave one of the
readings, and all of the older male cousins were pallbearers. It turns out
all we had to do as pallbearers was take the casket from a rolling cart and
put it on a rolling platform in the hearse. It was a high-tech system they
had there, so we didn't have to carry it as much as I thought we would.
Everyone said the boys looked like CIA agents, so two of the top agents had
to take down that crazed terrorist cousin Matt:
All the grandkids (and the grandson-in-law holding the great-granddaughter
on the far left):
After the funeral, everyone drove the three hours to Presho, the small town
where my parents and grandparents and great grandparents and great great grandparents
grew up. Some sights from the drive:
Finally we saw the sign that said "Welcome to PRESHO - It's All Here,
With a SMILE" and we knew we were there. We got checked in to Hutch's
Motel (still run by one of the Hutch boys, and his brother still runs Hutch's
cafe, right next door. It really is a small town.)
Presho's Main Street, in a picture from 1904, compared to 2004. What a difference
100 years makes!
The burial was later that afternoon at the Presho Cemetary. There was a big
crowd, because everyone in the town knows everyone in my family (if some of
the Jones kids were sitting in Hutch's Cafe or someplace, we'd have people
coming up to us and saying 'You must be one of the Jones boys!' because they
can see the resemblance.)
Everything looked very nice - there were a lot of flowers all over the place.
The grandkids each took a rose and put them on the sides of the casket after
the service. They didn't actually bury her until everyone had left, but we
saw the big fancy casing they put the casket it - it had a plaque that said
'Rosemary Jones - 1930-2004.' I thought that that piece would stay above ground,
but it turns out that it all goes underground, and she'll have a gravestone
just like my great-grandparents (Grace Jones and John "Blacklion"
Jones) and great-great-grandparents (Mae Bailey and George Bailey - possibly
connected to the George Bailey from 'It's a Wonderful Life'), who are right
nearby.
Afterwards we went to the Presho Catholic Church where they had some food
for everyone. They told stories about how all the Catholics in town built
the church together - and my Grandma was the one that originally painted that
steeple.
After that, the kids walked over to a nearby park and enjoyed the swings while
wearing our funeral suits.
My brother and I on the swings:
Then we drove around Presho, seeing all the sights from the past:
The house my dad grew up in:
They lake my dad and aunts and uncles used to skate on in the winter:
The house that my great-grandparents used to live in:
And there were some nice photo ops without family history attatched, as well:
One of my favorite pictures I've ever taken:
The next morning, after taking an artistic picture of my shadow, we went to
Hutch's Cafe for breakfast. Everything tasted good, although my brother had
some issues with the coffee...
After breakfast we packed up and headed out of Presho to go back to Sioux
Falls.
On the way back we stopped at a rest stop, where they had a special restroom
for those folks who are men, but won't be for very long.
The rest of the week, as the family gradually all went home, the time was
spent around the condo with Grandpa. Over the week I heard many stories about
the history of the Jones family - it was really fascinating. When we weren't
telling stories, we were working - addressing thank-you notes, figuring out
where to send all the money that people gave as a memorial. My Grandpa is
donating all of it, mostly to the Presho Museum and the Christ the King school.
And when we weren't at the condo, we went out to dinner at fancy restaurants,
including Minervas (pictured), where I was thoroughly spoiled, so that it
will be difficult to return to my Top Ramen dinners. But it was delicious
while it lasted.
There were also quite a few flower deliveries to the house over the week:
And an interesting flower story, my Grandma bought this painting of flowers
at a state fair years ago, and it was her absolute favorite picture, but when
they moved to the condo a few years ago they couldn't find it anywhere. But
then this week, my Grandpa saw a peanut on the floor of his bedroom, and when
he leaned over to pick it up, he saw the picture underneath of the bed. So
he pulled it out, and that day we put it up on the wall, where she would have
wanted it.
On Friday it was time to head back to the skies and fly home. Of course I
took many pictures from the window of the plane because I like pictures of
louds too much (especially when it's approaching sunset, as it was on our
first flight).
And now I am home, enjoying this last weekend before I go up to Bellingham
on Wednesday to prepare for move-in day on the 19th (as I'll be a move-in
helper), and classes begin on the 22nd.
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© 1997-2006 Nathaniel Jones - Blue Chair Entertainment